i’m having trouble breathing. it’s beyond my mind why. it’s not them. i can’t cry. i can’t smile. i’m tortured in this emotional limbo. i’m going crazy. i want to be nice i want to be love. but it’s so hard. i just want to be me but i know i have to be better. i have to try to be better. i cry to jesus your will it’s too overwhelming. take this cup from me abba please. i want to be better then you’ll love me. no you love me from before, from the start, from before the start. imperfect, never enough, me. so i’ll be better i promise me you them.